So How Do I Really Feel About Cancer?

I'm angry and fed up and don't feel like a woman! my hair should be falling out this week or next week at the latest. I'm devastated having to loose my hair, having a breast removed spending everyday not feeling normal. Plus the fact that I'm 38 yrs old sucks. Chemotherapy can bring on the menopause so possibly that to look forward to as well. So how does a person cope with all that? Plus the fact Kevin is in another country doesn't help either or not been able to be upset around the children or family in case I upset someone else. Sometimes I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders and it doesn't get any easier to cope with. Everyone tells me how strong I am I don't see it. Inside I feel like falling to pieces. One thing I do know Is that I am a fighter and I'm not going to give up. I also know there are thousands of people in the world fighting Cancer and all different ages to and I feel for everyone going through it. I have to put up a big front all the time when really it's so very hard to cope with. I feel like I deserve a brake and have been through enough to last a life time. My life has to get better at some point it just has to!