What Gets Me Through The Day?

So I'm asked how do I get through the day and it's a very good question for people to maybe understand how things really are. Partner, kids, family. Cousins. Aunt's and god. I try to get through the day without thinking to much about my cancer because when I do just sometimes I'm in floods of tears.I Feel like that I have to be strong around Margaret Stephen Sarah and visitors. Sometimes it makes me so upset that I can't talk about it then other times I'm fine with questions and feelings. Inside me the question is always there why me ? Then my answer is we all have to suffer in someway it's just how it works.Although I feel like I'm aching so much inside. Pain wise I take 90mg of oxyconton morning and night along with break through 30mg of oxynorm. I also have pain patches. It's a lot and sometimes I don't need to take all that other night's I do. I suffer bad with back pain slipped pelvis and cancer on top of that, my knees hurt so bad from cancer and sometimes my shoulders. On top of that is the asthma with I have a nebulizer for so I thank god for that. It is a lot of physical and emotional pain it's very hard to deal with. I have more bad days then good days but I can keep that hidden pretty well when I have to. I do so much enjoy the visits from everyone that want to come and see me but there is no pressure from me. I don't want to up the strong medicine as high as I can because what happens if I get worse? what options am I left with?