When my last big chemotherapy session finishes I never want to have to go through that again. I'm going to celebrate after the last one is done with. It has been the toughest thing ever to have to go through. I find the more Chemotherapy I have the tougher it gets. I have learned so much in the last few months. It's been so hard on the whole family in so many ways. It has destroyed my self esteem totally. Kevin has had to put up with so much stress and sadness and has stood by me every single step of the way. He has been an angel to me and the children. It has not been one bit easy for anyone. The children have had to suffer in lots of ways with me been sick by missing out on so much. They all deserve gold trophies for how they coped and still cope. I have been miserable, moody, upset, angry, exhausted and I want everyone to be happy.
I admire their strength to keep me going through all that awful Chemotherapy and I love them with all my heart. If I was a fairy I'd use my wand and make their dreams come through after all the suffering they have been put through. My heart brakes for anyone going through cancer and their families. You can never really understand something unless you go through it yourself. It's not just the cancer so many other things as well that you'd never even imagine.
It is a testament to who you are as a person that has enabled your family and Kevin to be so supportive. They know the real Catherine. It sounds like it has been a tough road for all of you. Added to all the cancer treatments, the effects, mood swings and ravages of the disease, you are also burdened with guilt. My heart goes out to you, Catherine. I will be so happy for you when it is over a week after this last chemo appt. because then you can begin to mend and heal your spirit. Stay strong. You're almost through! Love, Andrea aka @andreager on Twitter
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ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you, I never want to go through this crap again! I can't believe some people do go through it more than once. Chemo is pretty rugged. I'm glad you have good support with Keven and the kids. It is hard to not feel guilty about putting your family through this, I struggle with that myself as well. When do you finish chemo anyway? Best wishes to you.
Hi Andrea. Thank you for your comments. Yes it has been hard for everyone in the house. Everyone is looking forward to the last Chemo session to be over with.
ReplyDeleteHi Nancy. Thank you for your comments. I don't know how people do Chemo more then once either it is nasty and so sickening. Wednesday week is my last big Chemo session. I know you have 2 more Big sessions ahead and I wish you all the best and hope your not to sick after them. x
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